Here’s what you need to know about your sex drive after childbirth.
Motherhood is a beautiful and rewarding experience, but it is also exhausting and overwhelming. If your sexual desire has taken a dip, you’re definitely not alone.
It's perfectly normal to experience a lowered sex drive after childbirth. Your body has undergone significant changes, and your hormones are fluctuating all over the shop. The drop in your Oestrogen and Progesterone levels post-delivery can cause a decrease in natural lubrication, and breastfeeding can further reduce Oestrogen levels, making it difficult for you to feel "in the mood."
Don't put extra pressure on yourself to engage in sexual activities before you feel ready. After 4-6 weeks, your hormone levels are said to stabilise, and you may start feeling more relaxed in the bedroom, and more like yourself again. Remember, extra Lubrication is always a great idea to help you feel comfortable (we can’t think of any situation that isn’t improved lube tbh!) and remember to take things slowly and always at your pace. Communicate clearly with your partner, and remember consent is a continuous conversation that can be taken away at any point.
Your emotional wellbeing also plays a significant role in your libido. Giving birth and adjusting to motherhood can trigger a range of complex emotions, including (but not limited to) post-natal depression, all of which can affect your sex drive. Remember it’s ok to ask for help from friends, family and loved ones and always seek the support of your doctor if you are experiencing post-natal depression.
Lack of sleep and the stress associated with caring for a new baby takes its toll on your emotional health, and many doctors believe that emotional factors play a more significant role in decreased postnatal libido than physical factors. They say it takes a village, so where possible lean on the people around you. Taking breaks and getting help with the baby can do wonders for your emotional distress.
How you feel about yourself and your body can affect your libido. Adjusting to postpartum physical changes such as weight gain, stretch marks, breast size, and C-section scars can make you feel uncomfortable and disconnected from your body. It's essential to communicate with your partner about your feelings. Try to work towards loving your postpartum body - We appreciate it can be hard, but always try to remember the amazing things your body has done for you and your little one.
“When I look at my new stretch marks and the changes that my body went through, it reminds me that, as women, we’re all superheroes. I’m always reminded that our bodies were built to do this. It’s such a beautiful thing to be able to give birth, but I didn’t realize it until afterward.”
- Ashley Graham
Try not to be hard on yourself about your lower libido levels – you are right where you need to be. It is extremely common and perfectly normal. Be kind to yourself, you lovely lot.
If you are struggling and need extra support, please contact your GP or one of the amazing charities below:
https://pandasfoundation.org.uk/
https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/post-natal-depression/treatment/
Photography: @cydneythelight via Instagram