We get it, life is stressful.

Friends, family, busy work schedules, social commitments & information overload… it’s not at all surprising we’re stressed, overwhelmed and over-stimulated.

If you’ve noticed your sex drive has taken a dip, firstly don’t be hard on yourself (although we appreciate this is easier said than done). The majority of the time there are other things at play - we suggest taking some time to discover what these blockers could be to ensure you’re in the best place possible to move things forward. Read on for guidance on what could be impacting your sex drive & a few ideas to help you move forward in your pleasure journey…

 

Why is my sex drive low?

Low libido levels are influenced by a combination of factors, from lifestyle choices (such as diet & exercise), stress levels, hormonal changes & medication, through to mental health challenges (such as depression & anxiety).

 

Hormonal fluctuations in women

Understanding these hormonal intricacies can empower you to navigate the ebbs and flows of your libido with a little more insight and warmth.

• Ever noticed a surge in your sexual desire during ovulation? Well, that's your oestrogen levels reaching their peak, my friend! Oestrogen and Progesterone, the dynamic duo of female sex hormones, play a significant role in influencing your libido, especially during your menstrual cycle.

• Now, let's talk testosterone. Often associated with guys, but guess what? Women produce it too. Testosterone is a key player in our sexual health, influencing desire and arousal. When testosterone levels dip, so can our sexual desire, so it's essential to keep an eye on those hormone levels.

• Ah, the wonders of pregnancy and postpartum. Hormonal rollercoaster alert! During these phases, Oestrogen and Progesterone take centre stage, and their fluctuations can cause a dip in libido. It's all part of the beautiful journey, but it's good to be aware of the changes.

• Enter menopause, another chapter in the hormonal adventure. Oestrogen and testosterone take a bit of a backseat, leading to challenges like vaginal dryness and a decreased sex drive. Understanding these changes can help navigate this natural phase with grace.

• Cortisol, the stress hormone, always seems to have a way of dampening the mood. Chronic stress disrupts the hormonal balance, leading to a dip in libido. Try to create space for things that bring you joy & aim to implement relaxation techniques to keep cortisol in check. In turn, this will help you maintain a healthy desire for intimacy.

• Thyroid hormones are like the conductors of the body's orchestra, regulating metabolism, energy, and mood. Both too much (hyperthyroidism) and too little (hypothyroidism) can throw off the rhythm, affecting sexual desire. Keep that thyroid in harmony for a happy libido!

• Prolactin, released by the pituitary gland, can be a sneaky libido dampener, especially for breastfeeding mums. Elevated levels can suppress oestrogen and testosterone production, affecting your desire for intimacy. It's a temporary phase, so go easy on yourself, particularly as you are doing the more important role of growing a tiny human, but it’s always good to be aware of the hormonal dance during this time.

 

Lifestyle Choices:

A happy, healthy lifestyle can translate to a happy, healthy libido. Here are some things to consider to help improve your desire levels.

 

Nourishment Matters

Ever had second thoughts about that late-night pizza order? We believe it is important to treat yourself, but it is also about balance. Here's the scoop: a diet lacking essential nutrients isn't just a hit on your health; it can put a dent in your libido too. Think lots of fruits, veggies, and lean proteins to keep your sexual health in top shape. Short on vitamins like B6 and E, essential fatty acids, or minerals like zinc and selenium? They play a crucial role in your hormonal dance, affecting how you feel in the bedroom.

 

Move That Body

Exercise isn't just about hitting the gym; it's about keeping things flowing where it matters most. Regular physical activity maintains circulation and hormone balance, essential for a happy sex drive. A sedentary lifestyle, on the flip side, can throw a wrench into your cardiovascular health and stamina, putting a damper on your libido. Try a little movement every day, even if it is a short walk.

 

Sweet Dreams for a Sweeter Libido

Beauty sleep isn't just for your skin. Lack of proper rest can leave you fatigued and stressed, taking a toll on your sex drive. Chronic sleep deprivation even messes with hormone production, the very ones responsible for keeping your libido in top gear.

 

Cheers! (just go easy)

While that glass of wine might seem like a good idea, excess alcohol and recreational drugs can put a damper on desire and performance. Sure, alcohol might lower inhibitions at first, but it could be playing the long game on your sexual function and desire.

 

Inhale, Exhale…

Stress and an overpacked schedule can be real passion-killers. Too much stress doesn't just tire out your body and mind; it messes with your hormones, giving your libido a run for its money.

 

Mental Well-being Matters

Anxiety can be a real joy-stealer, robbing you of your sexual desire. Anxiety can mess with your self-esteem, energy levels, and your overall interest in getting busy between the sheets.

 

Love the Skin You're In

Body image is a big player in the libido game. Feeling down about your body? It can seriously impact your sexual confidence and desire. Time to embrace that wonderful you!

 

Stub Out the Smoke

Smoking may look cool in old movies, but it's not doing your libido any favours. It messes with circulation, reducing blood flow where it matters most and possibly causing a hiccup in your arousal and orgasm plans.

 

Connection is key

In relationships, emotional intimacy is the secret sauce. Unresolved issues or a lack of connection & communication can cool the flames of desire faster than you can say "date night."

 

Tech Detox for Bedroom Bliss

Too much screen time, especially before bedtime, is a buzzkill for your sleep patterns. And we all know, a well-rested body is a happy body, ready for some intimate interaction.

 

Medication's Fine Print

Some meds come with a less-than-exciting side effect - a lowered libido. Keep an eye out if you're on antidepressants, antihypertensives, or hormonal contraceptives.

 

So, how do I increase my libido?

Love this for you. 

Read on for our key tips to boost your desire levels. Pair these with a healthy dose of self-love and you will be back on track in no time.

 

Embrace the Lifestyle Glow-Up

Ready for a change? Try to move a little more… sign up for that first 5K, join a run club for some camaraderie, and say au revoir to fast food. Oh, and don't forget to cosy up with some quality Zzz’s every night – your body will thank you. Start small, though with little changes; Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither was a buzzing sex drive!

 

Zen Vibes for Your Mind

Stress is so last season. Invite some zen into your life with yoga, meditation, or a solo dance party in your living room. Make time for you & the things you love – you can find pleasure in all aspects of your life.

 

Big sister energy

Struggling with body confidence? Bring that big sister energy! Think, “What advice would I give my little sister in this situation?” Show yourself kindness and make sure you’re treating yourself with the same levels of grace. Treat yourself with compassion and work towards loving the skin you’re in.

Try journalling about everything you are thankful for about your body, and really shine a light on these aspects. Or why not try some mirror work? Work from the top of your head and give thanks to every part of your body, particularly the ones you are maybe feeling more negative about.

 

Mental health & medication

If you're dealing with mental health concerns, there's no shame in seeking professional help. Your emotional well-being is the secret sauce for a stellar sex drive.

If medication, such as SSRIs is throwing a curve ball at your libido, chat it out with your healthcare provider. They've got your back. Remember to go easy on yourself, you might just need a little more build up time to get in the zone – talk it out with your partner too, and they can support you with some of the groundwork. Your pleasure is their pleasure after all. Plus lube, always lube.

 

Love Yourself first

Let's talk about self-exploration – it's a journey we could not be more passionate about. Try to be mindful with it… Take a hot bath, and explore your body from head-to-toe. Think about the type of touch you like, and we don’t mean just the usual spots! Try light strokes on the back of your arms, your neck or between your thighs to hit those secondary erogenous zones, and see how it feels for you. Masturbation is a natural stress-buster, so go to town & enjoy yourself.

 

Add some sex toys!

Can you blame us on this one?! Dive into some spicy content, introduce some new toys and breathe. Trust us, toys can be a total game-changer (**cough** particularly the clitoral suction toys **cough**).

 

Communication is Lubrication

Strengthen those emotional bonds with your partner through quality time and open chats. It is important you feel safe & connected for your libido levels to thrive. Try talking about your favourite type of touch and show your partner by guiding their hands so they can replicate that for you (trust us, it can feel awkward at first but it will be worth it). As you grow in confidence, ask open ended questions about each other’s desires & fantasies, and who knows? Maybe you can give one or two ideas a try to help get that excitement buzzing.

 

So, there you have it – your guide to self-love, healthy habits, and working towards a thriving sex drive. Remember pleasure brings pleasure, so make small changes to get yourself back in the zone and we promise, you won’t want to leave again. You've got this, we believe in you.

 

Got any questions for us? We’d love to hear from you. Get in touch with the team via hello@pleasuregap.co.uk

photography:  @everlastingfabric via Pinterest